The first limb of yoga, the 5 yamas, are yoga ethics. Almost everyone is on board with non-violence (ahimsa), truthfulness (satya), not stealing (asteya) and not being greedy (aparigraha), but a lot of us like to ignore this last one… celibacy? Nobody likes to talk about brahmacharya. Some translations I’ve seen for this yama include abstinence or the reining in of sexual energy, but moderation in “sensual” activities doesn’t have to mean sexual. It’s literally about avoiding succumbing completely to your five senses.
I was taught that it means turning inward instead of having quick, knee jerk reactions to stimulation of your senses which can cause us to depend on certain crutches that aren’t serving us. Practicing brahmacharya helps us to find freedom from these dependencies, or at least practice balance when it comes to them.
I definitely experience overstimulation as a parent and am quick to just put on YouTube or a video game for the kids when that wasn’t my original plan. Don’t get me wrong. We fully use screens as a third parent sometimes, but I’d like to find more balance, do it less often, and keep from having that be my immediate first reaction. I’d also like to be more mindful about the books my kids read and the movies they see and to be more moderate about the screen time so that they don’t get sucked in and disassociate. I want to teach them to be mindful and focused on the important things that truly deserve their attention, like their relationships with friends and family, instead of tuning us out when we try to talk to them when they’re watching something. I want them to save their energy for their true friends instead of worrying about trying to please kids who maybe aren’t the nicest to them or who don’t seem interested in being their friend in a mutually supportive relationship. This mindful spending of our limited amount of energy can create the balance and benefits we find through brahmacharya.
